249

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants

248

There is not a thin line between love and hate. There is -- in fact -- a Great Wall of China with armed sentries posted every 20 feet between love and hate.

247

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together

246

Life is pain. So's dinner. You've burnt your garlic bread.

245

You're unconscious, moron. We can finally talk to one another.

244

"... just because you're paranoid doesn't mean there isn't an invisible demon about to eat your face."

243

"Don't look at me like I'm insane! I just asked you if my character should die at the end or not!"

242

"The way I look at it is that you haven't committed me into a mental hospital...yet."

241

"I'm not insane, I'm just a writer. Now shut up so I can listen to the voices in my head."

240

Some of them want to use you. Some of them want to get used by you.

239

I think I'd do better on my own, no friends, no fights, just me alone

238

It's getting colder now and the darkness consumes me. Depression is slowly creeping up. Maybe one day you'll actually care about me.

237

Lot of what passes for depression these days is nothing more than a body saying that it needs work.

236

Just because her eyes don't tear doesn't mean her heart doesn't cry.

And just because she comes off strong, doesn't mean there's nothing wrong.

235

Only time can heal your broken heart, just as only time can heal his broken arms and legs.

234

The pain of having a broken heart is not so much as to kill you, yet not so little as to let you live.

233

Never be sad for what is over, just be glad that it was once yours.

232

The cat has always been associated with the Moon. For like the moon, it comes to life at night, escaping from humanity and wandering over housetops with its eyes beaming out through the darkness.
Why then did I not know this.....

231

Recent Surveys shows that 100% of people who drink water die.

230

You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.

229

It a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it.

228

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself

227

Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life

226

Always laugh when you can. It is cheapest medicine.

225

You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon'.

224

When life give you lemons, throw them back and say I WANT CANDY

223

When life gives you lemons when no one is looking, throw them through life’s window and run away.

222

When life gives you lemons make grape juice then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.

221

Going to Church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in the garage makes you a car

220

My luck is so bad, if I bought a cemetery people would stop dying.

219

When you die, if you go somewhere where they ask you a bunch of questions about your life and what you learned and all, by far the best way to get out of it is just to say; "No speaka English

218

I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and stare at it for hours.

217

Programming today is a race between the software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.

216

There is a fine line between fishing and just standing there on the shore like an idiot... who brought the scissors?

215

Always remember, you're unique, just like everyone else

214

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

213

Everyone is titled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.

212

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss

211

You guys line up alphabetically by height

210

If the opposite of Pro is Con then the opposite of Progress is Congress

209

It takes an idiot to do cool things...that's why they're cool. - FLCL

208

Would you like a cookie? So would I.

207

If the world gives you lemons, you can make lemonade... or you can make a biologically engineered virulent air-born pathogenic virus that will wipe out the entire population of the planet, which would be a whole lot cooler.

206

Not all scars fade, not all wounds heal.

205

The world is cruel... get used to it!

204

real life isn't full of happily ever afters, just bursts of happiness that don't last very long

203

True love isn't free, but i'd pay anything to have it

202

You don't have to be faster than the bear, you just have to be faster than the slowest guy running from the bear.

201

We fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenage girls are good at 2 things: Staying Strong, and Being Ourselves.