Wednesday, 14 August 2013
Thursday, 14 March 2013
248
There
is not a thin line between love and hate. There is -- in fact -- a Great Wall
of China with armed sentries posted every 20 feet between love and hate.
244
"...
just because you're paranoid doesn't mean there isn't an invisible demon about
to eat your face."
243
"Don't
look at me like I'm insane! I just asked you if my character should die at the
end or not!"
238
It's
getting colder now and the darkness consumes me. Depression is slowly creeping
up. Maybe one day you'll actually care about me.
237
Lot
of what passes for depression these days is nothing more than a body saying
that it needs work.
236
Just
because her eyes don't tear doesn't mean her heart doesn't cry.
And
just because she comes off strong, doesn't mean there's nothing wrong.
234
The
pain of having a broken heart is not so much as to kill you, yet not so little
as to let you live.
232
The cat has always been associated with the Moon. For like the moon, it comes to life at night, escaping from humanity and wandering over housetops with its eyes beaming out through the darkness.
Why then did I not know this.....
Why then did I not know this.....
229
It a
funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very
often get it.
225
You
know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best
golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold
the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't
want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush',
'Dick', and 'Colon'.
223
When
life gives you lemons when no one is looking, throw them through life’s window
and run away.
222
When
life gives you lemons make grape juice then sit back and let the world wonder
how you did it.
221
Going
to Church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in the garage
makes you a car
219
When you die, if
you go somewhere where they ask you a bunch of questions about your life and
what you learned and all, by far the best way to get out of it is just to say;
"No speaka English
217
Programming
today is a race between the software engineers striving to build bigger and
better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and
better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
216
There
is a fine line between fishing and just standing there on the shore like an
idiot... who brought the scissors?
207
If
the world gives you lemons, you can make lemonade... or you can make a
biologically engineered virulent air-born pathogenic virus that will wipe out
the entire population of the planet, which would be a whole lot cooler.
202
You don't have
to be faster than the bear, you just have to be faster than the slowest guy
running from the bear.
201
We
fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid,
talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenage girls are good at 2
things: Staying Strong, and Being Ourselves.
Saturday, 16 February 2013
200
Entertaining
a notion, like entertaining a baby cousin or entertaining a pack of hyenas, is
a dangerous thing to refuse to do. If you refuse to entertain a baby cousin,
the baby cousin may get bored and entertain itself by wandering off and falling
down a well. If you refuse to entertain a pack of hyenas, they may become
restless and entertain themselves by devouring you. But if you refuse to
entertain a notion - which is just a fancy way of saying that you refuse to
think about a certain idea - you have to be much braver than someone who is
merely facing some blood-thirsty animals, or some parents who are upset to find
their little darling at the bottom of a well, because nobody knows what an idea
will do when it goes off to entertain itself
198
Having
the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die
and your mom saying you can still keep it
189
Nothing
travels faster than light, with the possible exception of bad news, which
follows its own rules
187
I
lay at my bed last night, counting the stars, and I thought to myself: Where
the heck did my ceiling go?!
186
Due to
recent cutbacks and until further notice, the light at the end of the tunnel
has been turned off
185
It
takes 47 muscles to frown, 17 to smile but it doesn't take any to sit there
with a dumb look on your face
181
You know your children are growing up when they
stop asking you where they come from and refuse to tell you where they're
going. You know your children are grown up when they tell you where they're
going because it might be time to say goodbye
180
90% of teens would cry if they saw Edward Cullen
(Robert Pattinson) from Twilight standing on top of a skyscraper about to jump.
If you're part of the 10% that would sit there eating popcorn and yelling
"Do a backflip you sparkly retard!" Then copy and paste this on to
your profile
175
There's
no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after
leaning your chair back a little too far.
174
I
love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a
dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
173
I
think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes
stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes
shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts,
then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier)
to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.
172
Do
you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You
take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem.
Every kid did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was
no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids
are soft.
171
I
don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have
fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when
they've invented the lighter?
Monday, 4 February 2013
166
If
the world gives you lemons, you can make lemonade... or you can make a biologically
engineered virulent air-born pathogenic virus that will wipe out the entire
population of the planet, which would be a whole lot cooler.
Quote 161
You
don't have to be faster than the bear, you just have to be faster than the
slowest guy running from the bear.
Quote 160
We
fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid,
talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenage girls are good at 2
things: Staying Strong, and Being Ourselves.
Quote 158
Having
the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die
and your mom saying you can still keep it.
Quote 156
"True
love is when you don't want to sleep because real life is so much better than a
dream"
Quote 150
You
know you live in 2013 when..
1. You accidentally
try to enter your password into the microwave.
2. You haven't played
solitaire with real cards in years.
3. The reason for not
staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have Twitter/Facebook/MySpace/Instagram.
4. You'd rather look
all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the TV.
6. Your evening
activity is sitting at the computer.
7. You read this
list, and keep nodding and smiling.
8. You think about
how stupid you are for reading this.
9. You were too busy
to notice number five.
10. You actually look
to check if there was a number five.
11. And now you're
laughing at your stupidity.
12. Repost if you
fell for it. You know you did
Quote 149
Nothing
travels faster than light, with the possible exception of bad news, which
follows its own rules
Quote 147
I
lay at my bed last night, counting the stars, and I thought to myself: Where
the heck did my ceiling go?!
Quote 146
Due to
recent cutbacks and until further notice, the light at the end of the tunnel
has been turned off
Quote 145
It
takes 47 muscles to frown, 17 to smile but it doesn't take any to sit there
with a dumb look on your face
Quote 141
You know your children are growing up when they
stop asking you where they come from and refuse to tell you where they're
going. You know your children are grown up when they tell you where they're
going because it might be time to say goodbye
Quote 140
90% of teens would cry if they saw Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) from Twilight standing on top of a skyscraper about to jump. If you're part of the 10% that would sit there eating popcorn and yelling "Do a backflip you sparkly retard!" Then copy and paste this on to your profile.
Quote 136
There's
no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after
leaning your chair back a little too far.
Quote 134
I
love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a
dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!
Quote 133
I
think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes
stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes
shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts,
then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier)
to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.
Quote 132
Do
you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You
take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem.
Every kid did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was
no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids
are soft.
Quote 131
I
don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have
fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when
they've invented the lighter?
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